No Small Chatter

I want to tell you about a group I have recently connected with.  If you have an on-going interest or even a developing curiosity in my case and cases like mine you will be interested in this group.  They are called Project: Not Guilty ("PNG") and have commented several times on my blogs as "The Team".  I have the links below so you can see what they have to say about my case, as well as a link to their website.

PNG is an advocacy group who is helping the non-DNA innocents claim their exonerations and more.  PNG started out in Texas, but has become national as there is such a cry out for help in our runaway justice systems.  You may not know this, but even if the Appellate Court clears a person they are still not considered exonerated.  In Texas they still have to go through a process with the State Controllers office and quite often are not given the exoneration that is so rightfully theirs.  Besides years in prison, ripped away from family, those who are falsely accused and wrongly convicted have been stripped of their good name, many of their rights and quite often find it difficult to ever be gainfully employed again or move easily within society.  The accumulated damage to a victim of the justice system does not stop accruing once the person is released from prison.

I invite you to take a look at the Project: Not Guilty website and the comment section at the end of my four blogs where they have imparted words of advice, encouragement and wisdom:

Project: Not Guilty

The Newsweek Essay Contest

The 4 W's and the Octopus Arms

Can They Have It Both Ways?

Investigative Team...Attorney Wouldn't Join

Now as follow up to the Internet chats I started sharing with you in the post called: "Investigative Team..." I have placed another part of those chats below.  While these people ("lionheartix") also call themselves my "team", to my knowledge they are not the same team that is coming forth in Project: Not Guilty as described above.  A small portion of the Internet dialogue on September 11, 2004 went as follows:

lionheartix:  one thing that Scott (retired FBI SAC - Atlanta) told me yesterday was about the FBI and IRS.  He said that you need to do a "white paper" to take to the FBI and/or IRS and/or Texas Rangers.

ifonlythiswasover:  I'll do a white paper, I guess that is something my attorney knows?

lionheartix:  it is a detailed report of why you are there, and helps them to understand and relay the reason you are there to others, either higher up or lower echelon.  hard for them to understand someone telling a story to them, so it should be written.

ifonlythiswasover:  why I am where?  at their front door?

lionheartix:  why you are in their office, yes.

ifonlythiswasover:  surely my attorney would know about that, I will put it on my list though.

lionheartix:  yes, but he really needs to understand why you want the FBI and the IRS and Texas Rangers to be involved.  there is just so much more of this that is behind the scenes that hasn't connected yet.  it's there, but not exactly clear yet.

ifonlythiswasover:  not clear to all of us????

lionheartix:  to your case.  it will take the feds....one of the agencies, or maybe both of them, to tie this case in with the fraud, the extortion/payoffs, etc..................      would it effect the business partner that things will be really under a microscope in your case?

ifonlythiswasover:  yes...I think so.

lionheartix:  it would definitely make him think he has to back off of you or get really investigated deeply.

ifonlythiswasover:  I don't think he believed this thing could ever flip back on him...I honestly think he sees himself above the law.  I'll guarantee you the contributor is the follower here.

lionheartix:  he could literally believe that, but if he sees a LOT of subpoenas shooting through the court for this information and history and different stuff that he never wants to be made public, then he will definitely HAVE to pull in his claws and start settling things.

ifonlythiswasover:  the contributor is different...but my friend keeps reminding me he is a bad guy too and to not lose sight of that.  from the start my friend kept saying "what does the contributor have on his business partner and what does his business partner have on the contributor...you find the answer to that and you'll find the answer to the false allegations."

lionheartix:  that is very wise for her to see that.


My attorney at the time said he would not go forward with the case unless we paid him an additional $50,000, thus I had to go to indigent status.  As you already know my public defender ignored all this, would not read the dialogues and said it was not our place to bring in the FBI or any other authority...no white papers were ever filed.  A lot was asked for in the subpoenas (although not nearly as much as could have been), much was never rendered, most was thrown out during the pretrial hearings...as privileged or irrelevant.  In my defense, my attorney refused to explain why we needed anything and kept telling me he would not divulge his strategy in the pretrial hearings. What strategy?

We have arrived at the Motion in Limine again.  Ten days before the trial this Motion was filed by prosecution, saying we could not bring up in trial any "prior bad act" of the contributor or his business partner.  My walking knowledge of their personal lives and businesses (including fraudulent insurance claims on the money in question) was the motive for destroying my credibility by these false allegations.  It was completely relevant and not privileged (no such thing in a criminal case).  The Detective, prosecutors and civil attorneys absolutely protected these two men (my false accusers).  And for that matter, so did my public defender by his indifference and inaction.

Below is the letter my husband, Ron, wrote Internal Affairs at Dallas Police Department.  It was not written earlier as I was incarcerated and we mistakenly thought this would be handled in the appeal, but was not how the appeal works.  You can see the response from David Brown, DPD Chief of Police and his Deputy Chief of Police.  Once again, putting the onus on my public defender in the trial.  So the focus is not truth, but procedure and how can truth be circumvented.

Brown so eloquently refers to truth as "differences in opinion".  That's a new one.  If the abuse of power is not caught on film, it doesn't count?  I have a feeling before this is over there will be a lot more finger pointing.  Immunity is a dangerous thing and takes the checks and balances out of the justice system, whereby nobody is held accountable for ruining innocent people's lives with their lies.  The above letter is like saying my officers/detectives can say anything they want under oath and if the public defender misses it or doesn't care enough to do his job then ...Oh well, you lose.  Are there any ethics in this so called "justice system"?  While it's a game to these players...that is, who can outsmart or out maneuver who...innocent people's lives are on the line.  What is the value of our lives, while these people are gaming?  Or after........

A Light in the Darkness!

Whew...I need a break!  All these posts on man's justice system is giving me the willies.  I need to speak on something more positive and I have just the story to tell you.  I found a gem, amongst all the negativity in the prison and jail systems.  A bright light so strong, in the most unlikely of places.

Within the Texas women's prison system are several units that are scattered throughout the state.  Most are Texas Department of Criminal Justice ("TDCJ") units, owned and operated by the state.  Others are contract units owned and operated by third parties.  My first stop when I left the Dallas County Jail was at Woodman in Gatesville, which is a State diagnostics unit for all those entering the system. While there we were basically warehoused while they collected medical data, IQ testing, educational level testing and gathering of family/social information on us.  I resided at Woodman for approximately five months where I first worked as a night janitor, working from 6 pm until 4 am, scrubbing showers, toilets, floors, walls, etc.  After about six weeks they moved me to the kitchen where I had various functions, eventually working my way up to the esteemed "cook" position.  My hours in the kitchen were from 1 am to 10 am.

Then one night (always after 10 pm) they said you will be transferred the next morning.  So I spent that night packing my very few belongings and going through the inventory process with an officer.  It takes most the night, then the usual breakfast is about 4:00 and a couple hours later we were handcuffed, thrown in a van and driven to the Hobby Unit in Marlin, Texas.  I was only there 5 weeks.  The Hobby Unit has the unique distinction of being the worst women's prison in the United States.  I will tell you about my 5 weeks there in a post all its own.  For now I want to focus on my most positive experience during those three years of incarceration.  Following the Hobby unit I was transferred to a contract prison in Lockhart, Texas which was owned and operated by a company called GEO Group, Inc. (traded on NYSE, a profitable business).  I just checked the stock, it is selling for $24.67 per share this morning and has the highest profit/earnings ratio in the industry. (Sorry, can't stop myself!  Once an accountant, always an accountant!)  They provide minimum security prison units to states.  I am pretty sure I know what corners they cut to get those profits.  I won't list those for you now...as I promised ...this is a positive post!

The Lockhart unit is where I eventually found my way to the Faith Dorm.  We had to request this program, explain our reason for wanting it and then go through an interview process.   People who had a history of behavior problems (i.e. any rule violations) are not considered.  By the way, I called us "people", but we were not known as people, we were referred to as "Offenders" and that is how we were to announce our presence at locked doors, etc.  Anyway, I will continue to use the word "people" as that is what I believe we were (and are).  The Faith Dorm housed 50 women, two women per cell with a large day room.  You can see the picture of the women in the Faith Dorm.  I'm in there but I'm not telling you where as I did not have any makeup on.  You can see the doors behind the women, those were our cells and contained two metal beds (about 3' by 6'), a wall cabinet, a small table top and stool, a toilet and a sink.  Everything was attached to the walls and floor, they must have been afraid we would steal their stuff.

In the middle of this two story "dorm" was a day room.  It had all the tables and chairs for our meals and in the case of the Faith Dorm that  is where we sat for our program, taking notes at a rapid rate as the information we were receiving was the greatest message on earth.

The name of the organization providing the program is "God of Hope Ministries" and is based out of Austin.  The women lecturing us represented many denominations... Baptists, Episcopalians, Methodists to name a few.  The program was very structured.  We received many books, including an amazing annotated study Bible.  Our devotional was "Jesus Calling" by Sarah Young and there were more books to augment the study of the books in the Bible and bringing that message to our daily lives.  We studied both old testament and new testament and correlations between the two were made.   We had daily homework.  Our day started with breakfast about 4:30 am, then we do any chores.  Next was individual time used for daily devotionals.  Many people had several devotional books so they spent time in each.  We were told to study over the daily devotions and pray accordingly.  You could hear a pin drop during this time, the respect for each other and God was awesome.  We were all expected to keep daily journals of what came from daily devotionals and any other personal thoughts throughout the day, all of which was reviewed.  We were held accountable for all assignments and our journal. 

The structured program/speaker would typically start about 8:30 or 9:00  and would run to lunch time, with one hour for lunch, then resume at 1:00 and usually go to about 4:30.  At which time we had to prepare for dinner, do chores and start our assignments.  After dinner we had our assignments to work on and could otherwise attend prison-wide church services and Bible studies.  Many of us would study further into the night and then start again about breakfast time.  It was rigorous, I learned more about the Bible and its teachings than I had throughout all my years being raised in a church and attending church as an adult.  Remember in a prior blog I talked about pretending I was in a nunnery to get through some of the toughest days while at Dallas County Jail.  Well, you know what they say, your imagination becomes your reality.  It truly did, with this Faith Dorm.  At our meals we would have intellectual and heart-filled conversations about all we learned for the day and our various perspectives.  It seemed Jesus filled our every moment.  There was just no time for gossip or other trouble making activities.

And when we all sang it was angelic...it always brought tears to my eyes.  The dorm was two stories and the acoustics were just God inspired.  I felt like I was in a different world, totally separate from the prison.  Our hearts were just lifted up to God. The speakers and program volunteers were respectful toward us and we were treated like intelligent human beings.  We were not treated like dirt as many of the officers were inclined to do.  When people are treated with respect, they tend to respond in the best way.  It created a learning environment equal to any university I ever attended.  And we were each very supportive of one another in our progress and learnings.  There was an occasional nasty remark among us, but it was confronted and resolved immediately.  If there was something that seemed irreconcilable, then it was brought to the program volunteers, nothing was left to fester, as part of the skills we were learning as we became stronger and stronger Christians.

I did not really see any rehabilitation happening among the women prisons.  But, with its intensity, this program was the key to changing its participants lives and beyond much of what is even offered in the free world .  And, how often do we have time for such a commitment in our busy lives in the free world, between work, family and friends.  While in this program, I came to believe this must have been how God made good the most difficult situation in my life, just like one of my favorite verses says: 

Romans 8:28  And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose.

If you are interested in what I've I told you here, you can look further at their website www.thegodofhope.org  They are "A Bridge of Hope from Prison to New Life".  These are some of the best people I have ever met in my life.  I do miss them, although I have no desire to go back to prison.  I have thought long and hard about becoming involved in prison ministry for the remainder of my life as a result of this program.